I did enjoy some of the April Fool Jokes and pranks people did email me. Will share some of them a bit later in the month.
This months Lighter Side returns to the more traditional dumb jokes. Because Easter is only a few days away I thought 12 Easter jokes would be appropriate. The same number of eggs in a carton, so I guess the yokes on you. Enjoy, it might help to think like a rabbit or an egg….Answers to follow the next blog entry.
1. Where does the Easter Bunny get his eggs?
2. What do you call a rabbit with fleas?
3. What happened to the Easter Bunny when he
misbehaved at school?
4. How should you send a letter to the Easter Bunny?
5. What day does an Easter egg hate the most?
6. Why was the little girl sad after the race?
7. What happened to the egg when he was tickled
8. How do bunnies stay healthy?
9. What do you call ten rabbits marching backwards?
10. Why was the Easter Bunny so upset?
11. What happened when the Easter Bunny caught his
head in the ceiling fan?
12. What does the Easter Bunny get for making a basket?
April first is a day I truly love. It started when I was a pup and would watch my family pull April Fools Jokes on each other.
My old man would go to great lengths to fool my mom planning the perfect practical joke. My mom on the other hand would play something very simple on my dad. It was great to watch the one ups man ship they would do each year.
I once worked for one of my best friends “The Wonka”, he would rarely ever answer his phone, rather letting his secretary take the messages for him.
Knowing this I would pretend each year to be someone else and leave a phone number for him to return my call. My favorite was to be Mr Baer or Mr Lyon and then leaving the telephone number to the Denver Zoo.
His secretary would bring back the messages and he would return the call. Can still hear him yell from his office after making the call, “Charlie, that was not funny”. Everyone in the office knew that I got him. We still laugh at that some 30 years later.
So I am interested in your April Fools Jokes that you have perfected. Email me your best April Fool joke or gag.
It is that time again for the Lighter Side. This months humor are one liners. A slight departure this month from the word jokes or puns that are usually in my blog. Hope you enjoy them.
Did you hear about the man who robbed a music shop?
He got caught with the lute.
Did you hear about the bear that was hit by an 18-wheeler and splattered all over the place?
They said it was a grizzly accident.
I fired my masseuse today… She just rubbed me the wrong way.
Did you hear about the cannibal who was late for dinner? He got the cold shoulder.
I dropped out of communism class… because of lousy Marx.
What happened when the cow tried to jump over a barbed
wire fence? Udder destruction.
My cat ate some cheese and waited for a mouse… with baited breath.
Did you hear about the woman who didn’t pay for her
exorcism? They repossessed her.
Did you hear about the sale at the boat yard? It was quite an oar deal
The lighter side is a place to find jokes and puns that will make you groan, laugh or giggle. Today we need to laugh, especially after yesterdays Bronco loss in the Super Bowl.
See how many jokes you know the answers too……..need help, talk to a ten year old. Answers follow the next blog entry.
1. What do you call a man in the lion’s cage?
2. What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
3. What kind of tree grows in your hand?
4. Why did the man put a sweater on his hot dog?
5. What happened to the boy who drank 8 cokes?
6. What did the ocean say to the other ocean?
7. What do you call an illegally parked frog?
Normally I use something funny that I have collected over the years. This month I stole the following from Sunil Bali, who probably stole them from someone else. No matter, they are funny….. just enjoy the funny signs
1. Over a gynaecologist’s office: “Dr. Jones, at your cervix.”
2. On a plumbers van:
“Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.”
3. In a vet’s waiting room:
“Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!”
4. Door of a plastic surgeon’s office:
“We can help you pick your nose!”
5. On an electrician’s truck: “Let us remove your shorts.”
6. On a maternity room door: “Push. Push. Push.”
7. At an optometrist’s office:
“If you don’t see what you’re looking for,
you’ve come to the right place.”
8. At the entrance to a funeral company:
“Drive carefully. We’ll wait.
Once again, it is time for the lighter side. This months lighter side has a Christmas theme to it. So just enjoy and maybe you too will be going HO, HO, HO.
1. How do you know when Santa’s in the room?
2. What do you get when you eat Christmas decorations?
3. What do you get when you deep fry Santa Claus?
4. What did the Gingerbread Man put on his bed?
5 Why are Christmas trees such bad knitters?
6. What’s the difference between the Christmas alphabet
and the ordinary alphabet?
The answers will follow the next article. How many do you think got right……HO, HO, HO……..
Those who know me well, my friends, share their word jokes with me by email…….. This month I want to share a couple of them with you…….. Enjoy !
1. Did you hear about the Italian chief who died?
2. What kind of nails to carpenters hate to hit?
3. What do you call a bear with no teeth?
4. Why was the Rockies baseball game so hot?
The answers to these jokes follow the next article.
Halloween jokes are so cool ……. most of these a 10 year old can get, so now go find a 10 year old to help you with the answers to these jokes……….Smiling big time now.
1. How do you mend a Jack-O-Lantern?
2. What is Dracula’s favorite fruit?
3. What did the skeleton order with his drink?
4. Why couldn’t Dracula’s wife get to sleep?
5. What do you call a fat Jack-O-Lantern?
The answers to these jokes follow the next article.
This months lighter side is a slight departure of the word jokes usually found here. My love of a good pun will be here instead, hope you find them punny !
1. I was on a class trip to the Coca-Cola plant.
I hoped there’s a pop quiz.
2. A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
3. I tried to catch some Fog. I mist.
4. What does a clock do when it’s hungry?
It goes back four seconds.
5. I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
6. How do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it!
7.What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive
vocabulary? A Thesaurus !